If you really think about it, America is a lot like a bad boyfriend. It’s always getting into fights, struggling with a ton of debt, and is essentially spying on everything you do online. But on the flipside it does get a lot of Olympic medals and there’s free drink refills, so there’s always that.
Previously from College Humor: How To Prepare For Second Puberty
(PG-13 language) [collegehumor]