British shower thoughts hit differently than American ones. That’s because they say them in a nice accent. And they spell stuff with a “u” where a “u” doesn’t belong. Other than that, they’re pretty similar to other shower thoughts. However, the subjects of all these thoughts from the ol’ water closet are patently English.
As an American who went to London for exactly one week in 2005, I can honestly say I’m an expert in British culture. That’s the American way. I know everything about a country after a quick Wikipedia search and going there once. Good for me. Honestly, though, these random deep thoughts from England really opened my eyes. They’re just as deep as we are. I had no idea.
Here are the funniest and weirdest British shower thoughts from across the pond:
1. Most Countries Have An Independence Day, Except The UK Because Every Country Was Seeking Independence From Them.
A sad fact of history.
2. Americans Pronounce Independence From Great Britain The ‘British’ Way: Fourth Of July.
3. Here in the UK you can be sent to prison for not having a TV license and then watch television in prison without a license
Don’t forget to renew your license before the next season of Black Mirror. From new-monkey.
4. We’re lucky to live in a time when a search for “Germany vs. England” results in soccer scores as opposed to World War mentions.
This is a nice rreminder. From newestJourney
5. Prince Charles Is Retirement Age And Hasn’t Even Started The Job He Was Born To Do.
This fact from shrimp_42 is real. He’s 5 years past retirement age and not king!
6. No British King has ever used the internet
Amazing if true. It is true. From Elongated-Slurp
7. If the Queen of England gets to 100 years old, she might get a card from the Queen of England.
I hope she does it. From AlexGator93.
8. The biggest drug cartel in history was Great Britain.
If you remember the Opium Wars… you’re dead. Fun fact from waffles1009.
9. Losing ten pounds in America is a lot better than losing ten pounds in England.
10. Prostitution in England could be codenamed “pound-for-pound.”
11. The queen of England probably holds the record for the longest time in a single job without any promotions.
12. People like to joke about digging a hole to another country, but England and France actually did it.
They got it done. From klingers.
13. Every teacher born in England is an English teacher.
My mind is blown. From Gluxdope.
14. The Queen of England has been alive for almost 40% of US history.
Wow. From ButtecupColfax.
15. The British translation for the Canadians “eh” is “innit.”
16. “Jerk” in the US and “wanker” in England both have the same dual implications.
Something to wring my hands over and think long and hard about. From Rosannags.
17. When it comes to browser data, do British people “delete biscuits”?
Good question, x511100x.
18. It must be really tough to play a “Q” tile in Scrabble in England when you have to waste the “U” on words like “colour” and “labour”.
From us to you, friends. Cheers. Via buckboy28.