I love movies. They’re the only contact I have with the outside world now. My best friend is Leonardo DiCaprio. He doesn’t know that, but I do. Many movies get reality wrong, though. For instance, what’s with all these people “hanging out” with each other? Does that really happen? Hmm. The internet loves to argue about whether or not a movie is good, but what about when a movie moment feels fake? People call BS on those moments all the time.
Whenever I’m watching a movie, the emotional hump I have to get over is pretty high. Really, screen? You want me to actually feel something? Better make sure the people don’t say or do anything completely unrealistic, or I’m out. I need a lot of foreplay and no awkward moments or I can’t… cry. Is that “dead” body breathing? Sorry, this movie sucks now.
Luckily, I’m not alone. Many others have seen similarly unrealistic moments on film, and pointed it out on a Reddit thread of bad movie moments.
Here are the “fake” things that happen in movies that piss people off:
1. Movie bullets seem fake.
“Are people shooting at you? Take cover behind… anything! Car doors, drywall, couches, tables, cardboard boxes, it doesn’t matter! EVERYTHING is bulletproof!” –WreckNRepeat
2. The mainframe, I’m in!
“Hacking anything in seconds.” –your-playboy
3. I’m scared of you but you’re also probably right.
“Mafia guys, mobsters or hitmen: people who are in the business of killing people and disappearing inconveniences are intentionally clumsy or stupid when it comes to kill the protagonist.
No double tap, overcomplicated killing, taking their sweet time, not putting more than 1 or 2 henchmen for a particularly dangerous hostage.” –CapitanFlama
4. Hey, you’re right, but also why do you know that?
“Digging graves in wooded areas.
There are fucking roots everywhere. You can’t dig a 6 foot grave with a pair of shovels in an hour; that shit takes time.” –TheMightyWoofer
5. Good to know there are rules.
“When watching a show with intelligence operatives or some top secret command facility: everyone has bluetooth ear buds and are handing each other classified files on USB sticks. In reality bringing wirelesss devices and portable media like that into a top secret classified facility would be punishable by up to 5 years in prison.” –BaconReceptacle
6. Sounds hard to watch courtroom dramas if you’re a lawyer.
“Where a witness Confesses on the stand. There’s sudden surprise prosecution evidence. Witnesses monologuing on the stand. Minimal hearsay objections. So much forensic evidence.
Drives me batty.” –Starrydecises
7. ‘Tis but a flesh wound.
“When getting shot, stabbed, bones broken and beaten seems to have no physical detriment on a character. Get shot in the leg? Still able to run. Stabbed in the back? Still able to finish a fight. Ridiculous.” –Hissingbunny
8. You’re not that rich yet, are you?
“The fresh out of college student scoring a great apartment in a swanky part of town while working minimum wage job for themselves. In reality, you’d have 4 roommates for such a place, or you’re living in a dump in a bad part of town.” –Tsquare43
9. He is short.
“That everyone in a Tom Cruise movie is the same height or shorter than him.” –Pathologicguy
10. We’ve all been there.
“GUN RELOADS (or lack thereof) AND THE INSANE AMOUNT OF AMMUNITION THE PROTAGONIST IS “CARRYING.” –skbtwiz
11. What if the gas is on?
“When someone throws a grenade into a building and the whole building blows up.” –Trackull
12. Get your head back in the game!
“After a hit to the head or being knocked unconscious, people are fine after a minute. Concussions don’t seem to exist in movies.” –cambium7
13. It’s still uploading the info, sir.
“Shooting the monitor as a way of stopping the computer.” –Rysilk
14. If you experience labor for more than 20 minutes, consult a doctor.
“Movie depictions of childbirth are often ridiculously wrong. They make it look so easy, quick, and clean. This is not the case.” –Consistent_Fig6588
15. Leave me. I’m not worth saving!
“The member of the group that sacrifices themselves for no reason.” –Dregoralive