There’s nothing worse than someone who is so cheap that it actually hurts your relationship with that person. It’s frustrating and a pretty awful way to treat someone.
I once shared a car to a gig with someone who agreed to split the gas but when it came down to it, he would ask me for the exact amount down to the gallon that we used. Who does that?
I wouldn’t be surprised if that cheapskate knew these people who have taken to Twitter to share the cheapest thing that someone’s ever done to them.
1. More like “Oh My God!” parents.
An aunt and uncle—my godparents—didn’t get me a gift for Chanukah because I, at 5 years old, had made gifts for them instead of buying them something. If I didn’t spend money on a gift why should they. They called to let us know.
— Martha Seychelles (@Stufsocker) April 29, 2020
2. Solid friend right there.
Out with a friend – As I got up to go to the bar (my round) he said – "I've still half a pint left, just give me the money instead". Also, he once counted how many chips he had left before going to the toilet – Which I re-arranged on his plate to look as though I'd eaten one. https://t.co/GDrvRKJx7j
— Matt Black (@NoirMJ) April 29, 2020
3. How do you literally ask someone for 4 cents back??
I was once 1p short to buy a coffee from the machine at work (had 29p, needed 30p.) Asked around if I could borrow a penny. Colleague said he only had a 5p piece. He then proceeded to drop the 5p into my hand and TAKE BACK 4p IN CHANGE!
— Daniel Bounford (@dbounford) April 29, 2020
4. Not a chance, lady!
Happened to my bf when we were glamping. Lady came to the door with duck eggs and made it sound like a nice gesture. Handed them over and told him they were 25p each
— LouiiMcDo (@lmcd95) April 29, 2020
5. The worst roommate ever.
My girlfriend (now wife) and I shared a flat with a couple where the guy would ask for the full price of his newspaper if you read it after him. Amongst many other tightarse actions, he also counted the slices of bread. We didn't say there long.
— Dogma ate my homework (@DarrenHen_) April 29, 2020
6. No more free drinks for him.
A mate went out for a drink on Friday lunchtime with a colleague. They only had time for one, so my mate said he'd buy, the next Friday. On the Monday, his colleague phoned him up and said he'd just booked the next Friday off, so could he have the money for the drink he'd bought
— Graham Kirk (@GrahamKirk17) April 29, 2020
7. One person’s trash is another person’s treasure.
Used to earn a living from rubbish dumps. New law forbade climbing into the tip to get things so I'd help people unload and sweep up. Most would then dump stuff I wanted in my van. One refused because he was dumping an old TV for a friend and wasn't sure they'd want me to have it
— Bald. D. Geezer (@baldygeezer) April 29, 2020
8. Finders keepers I guess? What a cheapskate.
On the way home from school, at the bus stop, my friend said ‘What’s that stuck to your shoe?’ – it was a tenner. She peeled it off my school shoe and spent it in the newsagents. On herself.
— Julie Skelton (@JulieClicks) April 29, 2020
9. Seems like a lot of work to hide fruit like that.
A roommate suggested we start a fruit bowl in the house. As broke as I was, I started buying a nice variety for our communal bowl. His contribution: apples (loser fruit in Canada). One day I’m vacuuming and beside his bed I see his personal stash of kiwi oranges bananas mangoes
— Ali Hassan (@StandUpAli) April 29, 2020
10. You can’t even regift it.
Someone once bought an album I wanted, taped it and gave me the cassette for Christmas!
— Ian Helm (@ian_helm) April 29, 2020
When I became pregnant after taking the morning after pill my bf (who had paid for it) asked for half the money back …
— Annalise OBE (@annaliseb) April 29, 2020
12. Amazing they have the time and energy to be this way.
Previous owners of my house took the (fitted) carpets up when they moved out. Despite the carpets being of no use to them at all, they took them anyway because “those carpets were new, why should you get to have them?”
— μ μ (justified; distant) 🍑 (@ivegotamuon) April 29, 2020