Now more than ever, people need friends. Adults looking for friends could try Adult Friend Finder, but apparently, that comes with some strings attached. One person on Reddit asked the big question: “How the F do you make friends as an adult if you don’t drink?” and the internet provided some great suggestions.
Drinking kills a lot of social anxiety, but it also literally kills people. Each year, 95,000 people in the US die from something related to alcohol or alcoholism. So for people who are off the sauce, how do you meet new people and bond with them for a reason other than your ability to choose a good tune on a jukebox at the local watering hole?
I meet people everywhere I go, thanks to being an unapologetically extroverted narcissist. Others, however, might have trouble breaking the ice with strangers. Thankfully, there is a way to do it.
Here are the best answers to the question: “How do you make friends as an adult without drinking?”
1. A friend in need is a friend indeed.
“Borrow tools and actually give them back.” –bspartz85
2. Don’t take it too fast.
“Slowly. Hobbies, community involvement, through work. Good luck.” –BassplayerDad
3. Tell a stranger they smell nice.
“You see someone doing something you do or like to do or are curious, hit em with a compliment and then with a follow up question. Met some of my best friends because i liked the cologne they were wearing.” –imanAholebutimfunny
4. If they’re actually looking for friends, though.
“I started inviting people from online dating sites who said they were looking for friends to play dnd. Some of them were actually looking for friends. I also started a fencing group in my area and advertised it in relevant Facebook groups. A few people showed up and now we occasionally do things that aren’t fencing related.” –shroom2021
5. Just make sure you still tip.
“Even if you don’t drink you still CAN go to a bar. Order a club soda with a lime. No one is going to know you aren’t drinking a vodka/soda.” –_Chemistry_
6. It pays to like nerdy stuff.
“Dungeon and dragons!
The first couple of times bring some goodies, if you want to grease the wheels.
Fucking best way to find friends, went from two to twenty in a couple of months.” –Gernia
7. Dance like nice people are watching.
“I’ve made friends through work and through hobbies – I love taking fun classes. I like taking dance classes mostly and when you’re going to the same class week in, week out, you get talking to the other people at the class and friendships can blossom.
You can be friendly and smiley and strike up a bit of conversation and from that you build up a bit of rapport. I made friends by asking a couple of the girls if they’d like to grab a coffee after class and then it became a weekly “thing”, coffee after class.” –LasRua
8. Does eating the cookies count as volunteering?
“Volunteer! I became a Girl Scout leader and have become friends with some of the other leaders & some of the parents from my troop.” –chickenofsoul
9. This sounds like an Impractical Jokers idea.
“You stand too close to random people at the groceries and when they ask you what’s your problem, you tell them you don’t have any friends. Then you hug it out and become friends.” –MikeButcher
10. Three from a smart person.
“Work: never eat lunch alone, organise hang outs after work.
Professional networking organisations: nothing bonds more than hating your industry/job together.
Going out alone & chatting up strangers: woman here & have befriended men who approached me this way, so don’t say this won’t work for men. You just have to genuinely want to be friends instead of being a creeper. If you have kids & they have kids, they’ll WANT to be friends.” –eraser_dust
11. The program works if you work it.
“Alcoholics Anonymous Meetings.” –FiredBeno
12. Activity partners are friends techincally.
“In my experience, adults don’t want friends. They want activity partners. Pick an activity that you enjoy doing, find some people to do it with. If you’re lucky, some friendships will organically arise from that. If you’re REALLY lucky, they’ll even stay friends with you after one or both of you stop doing that activity.
But mostly, people just want activity partners.” –MyPeeSacIsFull
13. That’s too many things. Pick one.
“Climbing, archery, martial arts, European Martial Arts. Historical re-enactment, book and theater clubs.” –Pakislav
14. Man’s best friend.
“If you’re around or in a city, walking a dog is the best conversation starter.” –scrappycoco2494
15. A very specific answer!
“I’m gonna add a very specific one: the app Slowly. It’s an app who acts like a meeting app, except that everything works as if you were sending real letters. You can receive them from all over the world and 99% of people use it to make friends (over looking for a partner like most meeting apps).
You enter in your hobbies, maybe put in the countries, gender, age of the people you want to talk to (i left it open and received beautiful letters from aged people wanting to talk to someone), and there you go! I have met my two best friends there, one from germany and one from brazil, we’ve been talking for years now. It’s too much work for scammers, so everyone is genuine. I can never not recommend it.” –vivalnii